John and I rarely argue, but we do discuss things quite a bit. Sometimes we discuss them louder then others. We are both know it all’s and we both have our opinions -sad but true. We tend to “discuss” our opinions so much that we fail to listen to what the other one is saying. Sometimes we are both saying the same thing, just in a different way and the result is always he/she is wrong and I am right.
Not very often do I hear the statement “Honey, You were right”. Sometimes to be so smart, we can both be dumb. It takes the other one to point out things that we might not see for ourselves. Of course since we don’t listen to each other it takes a while and sometimes a lesson to see what is right in front of our noses. For example, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that if a friend calls you up and asks to meet you out, and then chooses the local ATM as the meeting place, that they are going to hit you up for money.
Another thing that really infuriates me is when you get a “Honey, you were right”. Followed by a look of “but I did it anyways”. And you know you are receiving what is called, Damage Control.
Sure, be sweet all you want, but for me that isn’t going to work. Sure I will take all the sweetness you can muster out, but don’t expect me to forget the discussion altogether.
I am not really an “I told you so kind of person” either. I prefer to be subtle and throw out hints until in fact the other person tells me – “You told me so” aka “Honey you were right”.
There is several areas in my life that I need to work on things. As I write this I know I need really listen more and learn. I know in the end John and I only have each others best interests at heart.
What is your favorite tips for good communication with your spouse/significant other?